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Cricket Caper: I went on a date today with a stripper, I think?
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| Cricket Caper: I went on a date today with a stripper, I think?
- Click HERE to go to the original thread with graphics
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| Hermit Hustler |
Cricket Caper: I went on a date today with a stripper, I think?
Can the fine people of SFN please help me out, I went on a spur of the moment date today and I think she is a stripper. If you have time please read my long post and let me know if you think this woman is a stripper?
I am in my late 20’s, single and your average construction worker who just happened to have a day off today and was on my way to the laundry mat. I stopped at Kmart to pick up Tide & Bounce; I get to the laundry section and pick up the Tide bottle when I hear someone ask me if I’m on my way to do laundry. I turn around and a beautiful woman is standing there, I tell her yes and she ask me if she could borrow some of my Tide and also give her a ride to the laundry mat.
It took me 2 seconds to look her over and agree to help her out. I check out and we hop in my car and the first thing she says to me is “don’t worry, I am not a whore”, she said this because the area we were in is where the casinos, strip clubs and street whores are located. I did not think she was a whore by the way she was dressed, she had a bunch of layers of clothing on and you could not really make out her body. She had on a beanie, hoodie, sunglasses, puma sweat pants, mint nike shoes and kind of had a new age hippie look. We swing by her place which is a motel and grab her clothes.
As we are driving to the laundry mat we start to get to know each other and I come to the conclusion that this chick is either on ecstasy, cocaine, heroin or she is a fucking crazy bitch, either way I knew I was in for an interesting day.
We get to the laundry mat and she has 1 small load and I have 5 big loads. After we start our loads she takes off across the street to go walk around Safeway. She comes back and we talk some more and at this point she is acting like we are a couple, she is calling me honey and rubbing up against me and the chemistry between us is amazing.
She finished up 1 hour before me and while she was folding her clothes I noticed that half her clothes were jeans and stuff and the other half were really slutty clothes. There was a see through fishnet looking outfit and other skimpy outfits that you would not where in public. There were a couple items she did not want anyone to see, she would turn around and fold them up against the wall so no one could see, and from what I saw one looked like something a cavewomen would wear.
We talk some more and I find out she is 38 years old and all fucked up on cocaine and pot. I was relieved to know she was just a drug addict and not a crazy bitch. When I heard she was 38 I was shocked, she had the body of a hot 18 year old and brand new big perky fake tits. She washed the top layers she was wearing and had on a t-shirt and her body was fucking insane. She was not wearing a bra and her tits were perfect and also nipping out.
At this point she is starting to come down from her all night cocaine binge and she is getting really irritated that I still have an hour left, she sticks around 45 more minutes when she decided to head home because she was really tired and wanted to go pass out. She leaves and I feel like a dumbass because I could be taking this hot woman home but instead I am stuck waiting for my cloths to dry.
At this point I feel like Brent with his fish tail stories about the hot woman he couldn’t close the deal with. I get in my car and head home when I see the same women waiting at the bus stop right down the street and she hops back in my car and at this point she is even more exited to see me.
We head over to a burger joint and grab some lunch, she insisted on paying and I noticed she had a bunch of cash in her really expensive purse. We start talking and I ask her what she does for a living (I was 99% sure she was a stripper) and she makes some joke and totally dodges my question. We talk some more and I ask her a second time what she does for money, she started to answer the question and then stopped, hesitated for a couple seconds and told me she just hangs out and collects money from the state. I drop the subject and we head back to her place.
As we are driving she starts telling me how she really wants to have sex with me but she is on her period and her new fake tits still hurt. So I again feel like a fucking idiot and tell her it’s all good we can meet up some other time and we exchange phone numbers. As we are getting closer to her place she starts kissing me while I am driving. She is grabbing me and french kissing me all the way back to her place. I pull into her place and we make-out for a couple more minutes and she gets out. She tells me we should hangout sometime next week once she is off her period. She headed up to her room and I headed home. When I got home I couldn’t believe I just spent the last 4 hours with some random hot women who is probably a stripper.
Thanks for reading my post and if I meet up with her again I will add to this thread.
Please let me know if you think she is a stripper. |
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| doggie6262 |
long post for a short answer.
yes |
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| Mike in Miami |
| damn sucks dating 38 year old strippers lol... go for the 20 year old ones |
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| Voz |
| Interesting story....I would need a picture to tell :D |
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| Hermit Hustler |
Quote: Originally posted by Voz
Interesting story....I would need a picture to tell :D |
I don’t have a picture but she was 5’9”, 110 pounds, big C/small D cup tits, blond hair with brown roots, tan, has a really nice face even without makeup on. |
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| JDawg3DX |
| Sounds like a whore to me, not a stripper... Or she could be a stripper whore... |
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| sweetquads |
| Not too many 38 yr old strippers. Maybe just a crazie milf. |
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| Jay Z |
| sounds fake but if true fuck her then get her to bring a friend in then fuck both of them then ditch that psycho bitch before she rujins your life |
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| flcnfan |
| Definately a stripper, and one that has been through quite a bit of c*ck so I would not even think about bare backing it. Also, don't take her back to your place bc if she is in a motel it might be hard to get rid of her or she might steal all of your stuff. |
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| TopContender |
| She worked you kid. She had no intentions of fucking you all she wanted was a ride home and some free Tide. |
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| Gator_Russ |
A caper means sex was involved.
No Sex = No Caper. |
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| Jesters Angel |
Quote: Originally posted by TopContender
She worked you kid. She had no intentions of fucking you all she wanted was a ride home and some free Tide. |
:lol:
Damn man, the first thing she said to you when she got in your car (a stranger) that she wasn't a whore. :rolleyes: |
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| JustRob |
since when did being on the rag stop a good mouth pumpin...
Believability is falling fast bro... If I got a hot coked up stripper in my car telling me she wants to fuck me but she's on her period...I'm whippin out the missle, pointing down to it and telling her that it ain't gonna suck itself! |
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| Krypts |
| should have just offered to fuck her in the ass. |
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| Hermit Hustler |
Quote: Originally posted by TopContender
She worked you kid. She had no intentions of fucking you all she wanted was a ride home and some free Tide. |
Of course she worked me for the Tide and free ride; I knew this was the case even before we got into my car. Money wise I did come out ahead because she bought me lunch and over paid me for the laundry machine.
Quote: Originally posted by JustRob
since when did being on the rag stop a good mouth pumpin...
Believability is falling fast bro... If I got a hot coked up stripper in my car telling me she wants to fuck me but she's on her period...I'm whippin out the missle, pointing down to it and telling her that it ain't gonna suck itself! |
I will agree that the believability factor of this post is shady, but if I was making this story up I would have added that I pumped her at the end. She never brought up having sex with me until I was about to drop her off so it wasn’t like she was backing out of something she promised me. By the time I dropped her off it was 4 hours later and she was totally coming down from her high and she was looking really tired compared to the really energetic person I met 4 hours earlier. I should have just skipped doing laundry all together and just pumped her back at her place for 4 hours. My life seems to be a bunch of Hatley style fish tales. |
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| SantosLHalper |
| what issue of penthouse forum did u paraphrase that from? :D |
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| Hermit Hustler |
Quote: Originally posted by SantosLHalper
what issue of penthouse forum did u paraphrase that from? :D |
I can assure you these scenarios happen to normal guys like you and I. Porno magazines get their stories from people like me who write down our real life stories about crickets and send the story to these publications.
It doesn’t matter if you think my post is real or fake, either way I had a crazy experience yesterday and felt the need to post it on SFN because I didn’t want to K-5 my date with a stripper.
“Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities; Truth isn't.”
Mark Twain |
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| TopContender |
| Dude, she should have given you some Road Head. |
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| Salkicksass |
| She sounds like a Hooker not a stripper.. |
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| southoc11 |
| Not sure where you are from, but I am guessing a whore and not a stripper.... |
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| catdr9155 |
Quote: Originally posted by Hermit Hustler
As we are driving she starts telling me how she really wants have sex with me but she is on her period and her new fake tits still hurt.
Thanks for reading my post and if I meet up with her again I will add to this thread.
Please let me know if you think she is a stripper. |
Grab your cock and run for the hills my friend. You just survived an AIDS infection. :bigclap: |
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| JDawg3DX |
| Here's an idea-if you are still interested in her, stop by where you dropped her off at in a few days... Take it from there... |
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| VENOM |
i was witness to something, i found amazing, i thought id share.......
yes, i was one of those geeks waiting in line for a playstation 3, with my buddy joe.... he is a chick magnet (spice boy type)
the morning the store opens we walk in buy our machines and walk out, on the way out.....this HOT chick looking, like a jess alba type.... pulls up in her car WITH what we assumed was her boyfriend.... she gets out and says hey ill offer either you guys 1200 for the ps3, i said no... and continued walking to my car... i turned around and saw my buddy joe talking to her still, he walks over and says hold on. ( to me)
he tosses his ps3 in my car, and i see them walk behind the 'target' store with her....
10 min later, he is walking real fast.... i was buzy smoking a joint... he gets in the car, with a big ass smile.. and says GO.......
ends up this chick offered him finaly, 1500.00 plus a quickie....except one thing..... we still had the ps3 in my car and were driving off. he whips out the 1500, in cash... and says i got this and some pussy......
as we pulled out of the lot, he looks back to see her there,trying to somewhat re-dress walking back from around the building looking around for him, and her new ps3.
had i not witnessed this myself, i wouldnt have believed it........ it was funny as hell
i only WISH i could have been a fly on the wall hearing her explain why she needed to redress herself, and was 1500 down , and no playstation , for her bf or whoever.
i wouldnt have done that, ..... but it was wild to see |
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| LanceJr |
Quote: Originally posted by Hermit Hustler
I can assure you these scenarios happen to normal guys like you and I. Porno magazines get their stories from people like me who write down our real life stories about crickets and send the story to these publications.
It doesn’t matter if you think my post is real or fake, either way I had a crazy experience yesterday and felt the need to post it on SFN because I didn’t want to K-5 my date with a stripper.
“Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities; Truth isn't.”
Mark Twain |
With a name like 'Hermit Hustler' of course we believe you.
:rolleye2: :uhoh: |
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| beachbum94 |
What's more interesting about your story is.....
you claim doing laundry and eating a burger as a date!!!! |
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| baldeaglejones |
| a 38 yr. old drug addict with fake tits and no car...sounds like a stripper to me |
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| Hermit Hustler |
Quote: Originally posted by beachbum94
What's more interesting about your story is.....
you claim doing laundry and eating a burger as a date!!!! |
You make a good point, no sex = no date; but I didn’t think of it as a date until she started saying stuff like “this is the best first date I have been on in a long time” and she bought me lunch. |
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| V00 D00 |
| Psycho milf stripper whore. |
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| dcmascot |
| next time leave the laundry and go have fun - you can buy more clothes, you can't buy good stories |
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| artiefan712 |
| Grab a sack of grass and some blow and fuck her like crazy. Have fun! |
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